Sup fellow degens, 

Slots are the casino’s favorite way to turn our rent money into their new marble floors. 

They’re loud, flashy, and designed to hypnotize you.

But what if I told you some slots are less of a scam than others?

I stayed up until 4 AM doom-scrolling forums to find the games that are mathematically less likely to rug you. We’re chasing RTP (Return to Player). How much money is the machine programmed to give back before it eats your soul?

Here is the official Degen List, ranked from smart bettor to "I Need a Lambo by Tuesday."

RTP: 99.07%

It looks like a game from Windows 95. It’s got tribal masks and looks ugly as hell.

This game has the highest RTP on the market. It plays more like video poker, you actually have to use your brain to hold symbols and respin. It’s tedious, but 99.07% is as close to a fair fight as you'll ever get in a casino.

To get the RTP, you have to play perfectly. If you hold the wrong symbol, the RTP drops quickly like a rock. 

RTP: Up to 99%

It’s that classic fruit machine you could play while chain-smoking.

The Supermeter is the highlight of this game. This game has two sets of reels. The bottom is the base game. This one doesn't pay much. 

But when you win, you can choose to move your winnings to the top reels (the Supermeter). 

To win, you must play in the Supermeter mode at the highest bet. 

Don't let the retro look fool you. If you play in "Supermeter" mode, the RTP skyrockets. But fair warning: This is high volatility. It will eat your balance for lunch, then maybe spit out a massive win for dinner.

RTP: 98%

Plays like a cheesy vampire romance novel.

This is my go-to survival slot. It’s low volatility, meaning it pays out small wins consistently.

It has a bonus round where you open coffins to slay vampires for cash. 

You won't get rich, but you also won't go broke in 5 minutes. It’s the perfect game for grinding through those annoying bonus wagering requirements without zeroing out your account.

RTP: 88% (Base Game)

Cartoon safari animals judging your poor life choices.

The base mechanics aren't that great. The only reason I think you would enjoy the game is that the Jackpot wheel triggers randomly. It doesn't require a specific combo; it just happens. 

If you hit the “Mega" slice, you win millions. 

The math on this is terrible. You will almost certainly lose. BUT, the Progressive Jackpot starts at $1 Million. This is the "lottery ticket" slot. You play this when you’ve given up on strategy and just want to retire tomorrow or cry trying.

RTP: Variable / 99%

Okay, they aren't technically slots, but they are pure degen fuel. You set your own risk. 

The mechanic is pure greed management. A multiplier line goes up (1x, 2x, 100x, etc). You have to click "Cash Out” before it crashes. 

You set your own volatility. 

If you want to cash out at 1.01x like a coward, you can go ahead. Want to hold for 1000x and buy an island? That’s the spirit.

Having a strategy for slots is like having a strategy for a street fight. Your plan seems solid until you get punched in the face. 

Here is how I (irresponsibly) manage my bankroll:

You should know that the house always wins. But following this budget strategy is to help you lose slower. We’re just trying to steal the silverware on the way out.

TL;DR: The top 5 slots you can play that have incredible RTPs.

Stay degen,

Dima